Issue #3 — Boundaries Are Not Selfish

The Soft Life Isn’t Just a Vibe. It’s a Line in the Sand.

The “soft life” trend has been everywhere. Aesthetic morning routines, oat milk lattes, doing less to feel more.

But at its core? It’s not about luxury. It’s about boundaries.

It’s about refusing to glorify exhaustion. It’s about choosing rest, ease, and emotional safety in a world that rewards overextension. It’s not about quitting. It’s about no longer overcommitting to things that cost you more than they give back.

I didn’t fully get that at first.

I thought I could sprinkle in some self-care and still keep up my old pace. Say yes to everything. Make it all look easy. Prove I could handle it.

But somewhere along the way, I stopped feeling proud of that. And started feeling depleted.

I realized the real flex isn’t being everywhere and doing everything.
It’s having the courage to say: This no longer fits who I’m becoming.

The Line Between Showing Up and Burning Out

There’s a subtle shift that happens when you’ve spent too long being reliable. You start to believe your worth is tied to how available you are. How helpful. How easy you make things for other people.

You become the go-to. The one who gets it done. The steady hand.

Until the steadiness starts to cost you something.

We’re often taught to be generous with our time, our labor, our love. But rarely are we taught how to protect our capacity. To say no. To be less accessible. To trust that who we are is not diminished by the boundaries we set.

And when you start doing that, when you start reclaiming your energy, it can feel foreign. Even selfish.

But it’s not.

It’s self-respect.

The Power of Saying No Without Explaining Why

Lately, I’ve been letting go quietly. Stepping back from dynamics that no longer feel aligned. Reclaiming my time…not just on the calendar but in my mind, my body, my spirit.

And the clarity that’s come from that has been undeniable.

There’s something new unfolding in the space that “yes” used to fill. Something I’ve been pouring into with real intention. I’ll be sharing more the week of June 2, and I hope it finds the people who need it most.

For now, I’m protecting the peace that made it possible. Staying grounded. Letting the work speak for itself when the time comes.

Because I don’t owe anyone an explanation for choosing myself.

And neither do you.

Questions That Helped Me Redefine Self-Respect

If boundaries feel foreign or uncomfortable, you’re not alone. Here are a few reflection prompts that helped me make peace with mine:

• What am I saying yes to just to keep the peace or avoid guilt?
  

• What relationships or roles leave me feeling more drained than restored?
  

• Where in my life am I mistaking availability for value?
  

• What could become possible if I stopped performing strength and started protecting my softness?
  

Let’s Keep This Glow Going

This space is here to help us reconnect with ourselves beneath the noise, the pressure, and the performing.

If this issue hit home, I’d love to hear what came up for you. Just hit reply and share your story.

Know someone who’s learning to say no with love? Forward this their way.

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Because the glow gets brighter when we give ourselves, and each other, permission to live it fully.

Until next time, protect your peace and remember:
You don’t need permission to put yourself first.
You just need to believe you're worth protecting.

With love and light,
LaShanda 💫